Because mom life doesn’t come with a pause button — but there are ways to find calm anyway.
Some days — like last night — nothing goes exactly how I planned. We didn’t get home until 9:50pm because both of my boys had football practice. I love routine (especially my 5am gym time!), but some mornings just don’t give you that luxury. And instead of spiraling into “I failed before the day even started,” I do what I’ve learned to do over the years: I pivot.
As a mom juggling two boys, a therapy practice, building a second business to support moms, and managing my health in my 40s, I’ve had my fair share of days where my nervous system feels like it’s on high alert. And over time, I’ve figured out that calm doesn’t come from doing more — it comes from regulating the biology that makes calm possible.
Why nervous system regulation matters
Your nervous system isn’t just your brain “thinking you’re stressed.” It’s a biological network inside your body that decides whether you feel safe, threatened, or in survival mode. When it’s stuck in a stress response, your body increases stress hormones like cortisol, making it harder to think clearly or emotionally reset.
That’s why just trying to stay positive rarely works. You can’t think your way into calm — you have to physically signal safety back into your body.
Science-Backed Ways I Regulate My Nervous System
Here are simple tools I actually use — even on the craziest days:
1. Breathwork, because breath connects body and brain
Breathing sounds simple, but it has real effects on your nervous system. Techniques like slow, deep breaths — or a 4-7-8 breathing pattern (inhale 4 seconds, hold 7, exhale 8) — help activate the parasympathetic nervous system (your rest-and-digest mode) and slow stress responses.
When I feel overwhelmed, even 5 minutes of focused breathing can calm my heart rate and quiet mental chatter.
2. Getting outside — even for a few minutes
You don’t need a long hike. Just stepping outside for 10–20 minutes of morning light can help anchor your body clock and reset stress hormones, which improves mood and overall resilience to stress. On busy days, I take a walk between calls or just sit on the porch with a coffee — it’s small, but it works.
3. Cold + warmth — simple temperature regulation
Cold exposure (like splashing cold water on your face or a short cold shower) triggers your body’s vagal response, helping shift out of fight-or-flight. After a long day, I’ll sometimes alternate warm and cool sensations — like a warm bath followed by cool air — to help my nervous system settle.
4. Movement that’s accessible
You don’t need a full workout. A 10-minute brisk walk, stretching, or even gentle movement signals to your body that it can relax. Research shows that physical activity releases endorphins — your natural feel-good chemicals — and supports nervous system regulation.
My Real Life Example
The morning after a late night, I didn’t get my 5am gym session. So instead, I stayed present with what was possible:
- Take a few deep diaphragmatic breaths before checking my phone
- Go for a quick walk with my coffee while the neighborhood woke up
- Take a moment to notice my body — where am I holding tension?
- Ground myself by standing barefoot on the grass while the sun rose
These small practices aren’t dramatic. But they work because they talk to your nervous system instead of your to-do list.
What I Want You to Know
Your nervous system is not failing you. It’s responding to how hard you’ve been working. And just like you’d care for your kids’ bodies and hearts, your nervous system deserves care too.
Regulation isn’t a one-and-done event. It’s a skill you build through consistency, not pressure. Something over nothing — that’s my daily mantra.
So if today feels loud, messy, or overwhelming… that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means your nervous system is alive and doing exactly what it was built to do. The tools above help it feel like you’re safe again, even when life feels noisy.
And if you want more practical support — tools that actually fit real life — you can always check out the resources and guided practices I’m building at mymentalsummit.com.